Getting a Maid - Key Issues to Consider

I have posted this reply on Singapore Motherhood forum and I thought I should share it here as well. The post below reflects some key issues I am considering if I want to employ maids again. 

Scenario #1: I want to go home all the time

I used to have a maid and I can empathise with any maid employer. 

On the contrary, I think all maids are smart - that's why they can see the loop holes in our government policies and use them to their benefit. They are highly competent - all humans are - but they will choose not to because being competent doesn't help themselves. Frankly, to them, there's very little incentive to be competent cos it means more work (for the same pay).

Regarding their attitude, I don't think I can blame them for lousy attitude. Being a maid isn't something that anyone is really proud of - even if you are paid to do it. From their point of view, it's just a lowly job that pays well enough to attract them to leave their home. So I can't really blame them for showing lousy attitude (but that doesn't mean her attitude doesn't affect me). No one, in the right frame of mind, will take pride in being a maid. 

We can argue that MOM should change their policies to help employers - MOM know they can, but they won't. There are implications to changes (esp. shortages of maid) and we won't be able to handle them now.

For those employing or considering to employ maids, look through and consider the potential issues and problems that might surface. Ask yourself if you can manage them if they happen.

1. maid runs away
2. maid lies - will you be able to control the situations so that her lie will be exposed (preferably with little time and effort)?
3. maid is careless; damage things - can be deliberate but you will never know, so can you handle that? 
4. maid keeps doing chores wrongly - mainly because they are stubborn/lazy not stupid, can you handle the process in correcting her patiently every time? 
5. maid gossips about you with other maids - can ignore?
6. maid eats your precious restricted food, uses your facial stuff and wears your clothes
7. maid moonlights and be part-time prostitute - should send her away, but can you do it without her creating a scene?
8. maid ill treats kids or elders - can still look at her without having thoughts of strangling her?

Most of the time, ask if you can control your emotions - not get angry/disappointed/frustrated when any rubbish happens. Actually, having a maid might train you to be calmer if you are dealing with your emotions the right way, but I supposed, not all people have that kind of mental strength (me included).

If you can't foresee yourself handling them, ask yourself if you can handle the current situation without the maid

1. is infant care\childcare an option? Can you manage your emotions if your child keep falling sick? 
2. is elder care an option? Can you afford quality eldercare for your loved ones? Are you able to handle the emotional upheaval in sending them there? 
3. will the housework be manageable? Can you tolerate messy living room, dusty shelves, tonnes of unwashed clothes? Or having to do housework til 12 midnight on a weekday? 
4. is eating out all the time a good option? Will it be alright to eat unhealthy takeaway half the week? 
5. with all the added stress, can you devote quality time to your kids? without getting impatient, angry, frustrated with the constant lack of time for daily chores?
6. there will be no time for your own enjoyment - can you handle that? 

Most of the time, it's about managing your emotions, balancing expectations, and having the perseverance to continue with each situation - involve your kids so that they will learn the right way to handling adversities. With or without maids, it's a fantastic opportunity for kids to learn about life.